7 songs about eric clapton

by Constant Velocity

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Let us dispense with false modesty. This is the best thing I've ever been involved with. It's the best this very good band ever sounded. We played these songs all over the Midwest for a couple of years before recording them. It is glorious.

And it has a LOT of guitars. Chris and I play a lot of guitar already. But that wasn't enough. We called in Aaron Starkey and Jerry Erickson to play even more. They're all over this album. Not to mention Tim Russell to play the sitar which is shaped like a guitar and is only two letters away from one! I think Jay can play guitar too, but all his hands and feet were busy.

Maybe too many guitars? We needed some different colors in there to break things up. So we called in Travis Bates to play his accordion. Then Sarah Lindenbaum helped us with some vocals we could not possibly sing (and we can sing pretty girly when pushed). Ah, that's better. Now we have room for more guitars.

So download this today and play it very loud. Just like we did.


released July 4, 2015

Well, you've got the three usual suspects plus:

Jerry 'Muttonhead' Erickson: Recording, mixing, guitar and backing vocals on Childhood Ambition, pedal steel on It's Not Very Likely.

Aaron Starkey: Blues guitar guy on 12 Bars. Psychotic space guitar on Hurtwood Edge.

Tim Russell: Sitar on Pretty Bird. Traveled back to the Pleistocene to obtain the real sounds of dinosaurs on Hurtwood edge.

Travis Bates: Played his ancestral accordion on Pretty Bird and It's Not Very Likely

Sarah Lindenbaum: Backing vocals on Pretty Bird



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Constant Velocity Bloomington, Illinois

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Track Name: Robert Johnson's White Devil Blues
Athletes are students of the game
Their labor's puritanical
Their iron will's mechanical
Precise, they exemplify the ideal
Yes they do

The natural could never say the same
The unasked question answers
Why, of course their better dancers
They don't think, instincts react
They play by feel
Yes they do

They like to give you reasons
They like to act berserk
They like to take the credit
While you do all the work
So at the church or at the crossroads
No one wants your soul
And no one wants to talk to you
And no one wants to know.
No they don't

If you
Don't practice
I'd hate to contemplate
You know
The fact is
You'll suffer a worse fate
Well, you could go to Parchman Farm
Or come to some far greater harm
Trouble follows certain folks around
Yeah, trouble follows certain folks around
Yes it do
Track Name: 12 Bars
You've come to learn guitar today
This relic from an antique age
Is going to teach you how to play
Before his wits have gone astray

When he was young he played with ease
He played the birds down from the trees
His dulcet tones the girls did please
He played the strong men to their knees


He once had lived his life so fast
A self-professed iconoclast
His sunken eyes now gawk aghast
With nostalgic sickness for the past

How could he turn the other cheek?
The world could inherit the meek
They're ripe, they stink, they smell, they reek
For none posses his fine technique


The man he struggles to make clear
Through the cigarettes and beer
The difference, my tone deaf dear
Between what you play and what you hear

So I will not reveal to you
A positive conclusive proof
You must divine the shape of it through
What I tell you not to do



Track Name: A Childhood Ambition Of Mine
Well I'm the luckiest girl alive.
One of the 24 or 25
Girls especially selected
To crowd back stage and get inspected.

Behind that door when I get thru
He'll see a heart so pure and true
I'll step lightly to his arms
And He'll succumb to all my charms

Well, what the hell is wrong with me?
Did you see something you now don't see?
Up close I don't seem such a prize
Without the bright lights dazzling your eyes?

Plucked from the buffet but never tasted
Am I too wall eyed? Am I too thick waisted?
Makes me sad. I love him so
But now I'm rudely told to go!

She goes shoulders hunched and eyes cast down
No money for the underground
Through bombed out blocks she walks no stopping
Past shuttered shops nobody's shopping

All the kids love rock and roll
It fills the void and ???? the hole
With plenty for austerity
And beauty for brutality.
Track Name: Zeal
I know what I know is so fundamentally
True and you know apostasy
What's done is done only one sound is right
Are you deaf? Do you want to fight?

Oh the sound struck me down like St Paul
Or Belshazzar and the wall
There is no blues but the blues and its avatar
Is Eric and his black guitar

Before I was without direction
My life a devilish torment
I'd wake in the dark, drag myself from my bed
Plunge headlong into chaos

Now it all has a meaning
Now it all has a purpose
I can pry some enjoyment
From my pointless employment

He's the only one that I endorse fully
I make my case so forcefully
Elevate the deity. A god. A saint
It says so in spray paint
Track Name: Pretty Bird
Your eyes pose a question
They're asking of me
Are the way that things are
Be the way things must be

All that's the case
Is the state of affairs*
And nobody likes it
And nobody dares

If you'd married George
You'd not give up lightly
What you'd come to believe
What belonged to you rightly

We're somewhat attached
And I think I would miss him
So serious and soulful
With his bullshit** mysticism

I know what I want
Want what I know
And I know what I want

I want to go out,
Not sit around and pout
And I want to go out

I don't know what I want
Don't want what I know
I don't know what I want

I want to home
I'm not having fun
And I want to go hooooome!

It's so photogenic
How three crowd the frame
But our optic alignment
Well it can't be the same

Your hangdog expression
From the magazine spills
As you drown all your sorrows
In liquor and pills

Won't budge an iota
Won't give a scintilla
How can I chose between two
Shades of vanilla
Track Name: Hurtwood Edge
Gentle blue clouds of
Warmth and apathy
I don't care

Sheltering shrouds are
Wafting and lofting me
I don't care

Earthly concerns no
'Cause I don't live there

I dwell in a place of peace and
Tender care

Disappointment and
Quotidian trivia
Don't touch me

Handlers hangers on
Attend the myalgia

Every cell, nerve
hair, root and fiber
Of my body

A tether runs from this to
Distant fields of poppies
silently growing

The words that I say are
Delphic, elliptical
And unclear

Voice remote and
hard to hear

The Way is clean and

Until you're living in
Obscure oblivion
And don't care
At all
Track Name: It's Not Very Likely
When you got out of college
The road ahead was clear
The car, the wife, the job, the lawn, the house
The kids to rear

Now metabolism's slowing
Signs of decay appear
Panic sometimes seizes you
And says, Get out of here.

As you drive to work one day
Upon the radio
The song it reaches out to you
Like somebody you know

Now you're hearing in his gentle voice
Rebellion without sacrifice
It's tempting to think that you could swap shoes

But it's not very likely that he shares your point of view
No it's not very likely that he shares your point of view

Steered clear of androgyny
His hair was neatly trimmed
Coked out in the 70s
Cast stones ye without sin

His blues walks hand in hand with his
Frumpy kind of manliness
And that, resonates so deeply, friend, with you.

But it's not very likely that he shares your point of view
No it's not very likely that he shares your point of view

The sultan finds his palace
Has ceased to pacify
You feel displeased and mild unease
As you muse on things to buy

The Janissary is staffed now
With one solitary haus frau
To whom it is a trial to remain true
And your life is filled with things you feel forced to do

It's possible the two of you
might get along quite well
Whom we prefer to spend our time
Nobody can tell

The common ground of kids and work
Might con-vince him you're not a jerk
Anything's possible, man
I suppose that's true

And later feeling bolder
Out comes the off-color joke
A secret smile plays 'round his lips
And disappears like smoke